Spiritual Advice: What should I do with my f*$!ing life?
A brilliant woman put the bug in my ear that I should have a regular (spiritual) advice column. The idea lit up my heart, and if there's one thing I know for sure, it's that when you get that "heck yeah!" feeling about an idea...you try it out. So here we go. I put out the call for questions/problems, and this was the first one to come in.
Raven, what should I do with my fucking life? - anonymous
My friend, I feel your frustration. And before I can alleviate it, I'm probably going to turn up the dial first.
What should you do with your fucking life?
Don't plot it around a purpose, career, person, or goal. If the answer to "What should I do with my fucking life" is ever - start a business, settle down, achieve this specific thing that I think is important - then you're walking a fine line between living your life and imagining that you're living your life. And most people walking that line slip. They find that years have gone by and they're no more satisfied.
Y'know why? I bet you do. It's because they've used the word "should."
A terrible word. "Should" is laced with judgment, obligation, and totally devoid of love. "Should" is what we use to get ourselves to restock the fridge, pay the bills, reach out (sometimes appropriately, sometimes not) to people we'd rather not deal with. "Should" has its place. But it doesn't belong anywhere near your decisions around what you do with your life.
So we'll rephrase the question: What do I do with my fucking life?
The answer to that is still: Live it.
When something peaks your interest, look into it. Learn more.
When you find that you want to go someplace, go there. Explore.
When you feel motivated to create, get your hands dirty. Exercise your brilliance.
Half of what you do, in hindsight, will look like a dead-end if you judge every move you make as something that either moves you forward, or sets you back. This is a trick of the light. Ignore it. No path is a dead-end. It only feels that way when you've imagined that you know exactly the destination you're headed for.
If you've got a question like "What should I do with my fucking life," rattling around in your brain and causing anxiety, frustration, and worse...then the best thing you can do is abandon the maps, the course-charting, and the goals for a little while. Reset. Feel out what it's like to be free, experiencing life according to your whims. Everything else will start to take care of itself. Goals will arise organically. Helpful people will come into frame. You'll find that you never needed to answer the question in the first place.
Got questions about spirits, or your spiritual path? Lighthearted or serious, vague or specific, you can submit your questions here and I may answer them in this column!