Don't Say You Don't Know

"I don't know."

This was my crutch. 

Raven, why did you discontinue readings? - "I don't know, I just felt I had to do it."

Raven, how are you going to structure your business with a newborn? - "I don't know, I'll just make it work."

Sometimes the phrase has a place in our vocabulary, namely when we're moving from a place of doubting that we can do something to psyching ourselves up to at least try.

How are you going to accomplish your big dreams? - "I don't know yet."

See, that's okay. If "I don't know" is a stepping stone, then you've still got momentum. The problem is when "I don't know" becomes the bench you sit on while you wait for someone to come along and show you the way.

It's such a tricky little phrase that I've banned it from my coaching sessions. Too often we use it as an easy way out. It's a convenient little eject button that gets us out of the hot seat. Many people (including myself) will use it when they're unwilling to confront the truth of their experience. And in the world of spiritual growth and personal development, that's disingenuous.

So, always endeavoring to practice what I preach, I've been eliminating it from my language as often as I can. 

A week ago my good friend asked me, "Why don't you want to do mediumship readings anymore?"

Who would've guessed, the first thing out of my mouth was: I don't know!

But I caught myself. I told her to give me a second and actually think about it. Except I didn't really think about it, I felt my way through it instead. I wasn't able to give my friend an answer immediately, but as I talked to her about what I really felt the answer became clear:

Why don't I want to do mediumship readings anymore? It feels heavy. It feels rude. It feels like I'm bugging Spirit, and in turn I feel sometimes that they're bugging me. I don't want that to be my relationship with them anymore. I want to get to know them and work with them on a personal level - not always asking questions, interrogating, clarifying, and treating them like endless fonts of information.

There it was. After months of telling myself and other "I don't know," I finally had the truth.

Let me tell felt good. 

Next time you catch yourself answering a big question with "I don't know" - Stop. Feel your way through the conundrum.

The truth is that you do know. Let yourself access that inner-knowing and it will show up for you more and more.